"Protecting your right to magical thinking since 2016"
All of our headgear is manufactured with the highest quality, 2 ply aluminum foil, and all models are guaranteed to reject all forms of variable frequency sub and ultrasonic broadcast Jedi-type mind manipulation, by organizations such as the Illuminati, Freemasons, and 1-800 Kars 4 Kids.
"The Indiana Jones"
This stylish chapeau will protect your continued belief that the Pyramids were used for grain storage, were built by Aliens, and that they are a marker for future alien returns. Sort of a giant stone GPS.
This model will ward off any proven scientific facts that would negate your continued belief that the moon landings were faked. It will also protect you from Haarp radiation containing imbedded messages telling you to support the Koch brothers, the Keystone pipeline, and to binge watch the Kardashians.